Love blue’s

Tears on both ends and a long silence between people across the satellite connections. The silence says it all. There’s a lot that we wish to do and yet nothing that we can do.

Letting you go for I can’t afford to make you live! Getting over was never so difficult. Answer to your prayers for someone’s well being can take a lot out of your own share. It’s a mere transaction, nothing more nothing less.

While the journey continues eyes refuse to see the kind offers of life on other hand.Being fair to someone and being unfair to someone, a potion of poison that I drink daily.A part will always remain in grave with the pain that refuses to leave this realm.

Love will always hover over the dead bodies for decades to come with the fragrance of pain sacrifice and silence.

A grief that shall not leave this planet even after the soul departs.

Murky home

 

Sometimes you just don’t want to say anything to anyone. Being discreet seems to be the key. The safest place on this planet is your home. The home within yourself.

My residence is Dark.Timeworn walls of soul,  howling fears, graves of dreams, infinite tales of loss, sacrifice, love ,injury and my shadow of revenge under life imprisonment!

No matter how much they try to peep from the windows of eyes or doors of lips they will not be heard…………

 

Depressing Depression!

IMG_20160317_154808Things are certainly not good around and there’s always a ray of hope peeking through the window of life and telling you that things are going to get better. What happens when you fail to believe in that ray or rather try to believe but just doesn’t happen.

I don’t know if I should complain or thank the universe for blessing me with love endlessly. One person drifts away holding the harsh truth within and hoping for you to live happily ever after while one is already waiting with stretched arms to take you to his kingdom! Yet I fail and stand blank as ever between the two. Deep down the facts are known yet the feet doesn’t move forward despite all efforts! People around keep saying Move on! You have to leave the past behind! Look at what you have! Accept the facts…I hear and I try to lead a regular routine and yet every night when I close eyes I feel miserable.

The sad tunes of violin feel as if these are the very strings of my own heart. The scream is no longer heard and I don’t even know for what I wish to scream and what is that I swallow as silence. Avoiding people and embracing loneliness has become a habit. Unexplained rage, deep breaths and trembling emotions keep coming out of the curtain no matter how much you try to hide behind the smile.

Someone who has known you as a strong person will never realise that you are depressed, they would continue to sing their own songs of sorrow no matter what. People who love you can’t see you sad will expect you to act and come out, not realizing that you try harder every morning and fall asleep defeated by every night.

Depression is a like black hole it keeps attracting you and pulling you. I keep getting weaker and weaker at the root of every nerve. They say people who succumb to this darkness, suicide and are weak. But I feel they are not weak. They are strong for they can gather the courage to end it for all times and bear the pain of body and the last moment where the spirit escapes just like smoke trapped for years and years in some vintage jar of long lost sunken ship.

Facing, explaining to everyone around that nothing is helping at all and there is no answer to this empty feeling is like just fighting a the lost battle over and over again with yourself.

Scars of time…

The sun saying goodbye to me and then shining upon you on the other side of world.

Isn’t it the same sky that we share and same stretch of earth that we step together? Why does this distance seem long and probably one that can’t ever be covered? Why can’t I travel by the dusk and dawn to be with you?

Is there a drop of you tear in the rain that I try to hold, is that your touch that wind brings to me and do you feel my kiss when the sun shines upon you? Is that your heart beat in the thunder and is that my heart that shakes in trees between storms? Do you hear the words lingering around us in the bubble of silence termed as strength.

Is that our love clouding the sky with smoke as your remains burn ……..

 

 

He shall watch watch from the clouds….

Discovering Life~

56_Farewell my love!!_unknown

Only the sea knows what the waves scream by the day and turns silent by the rising of moon,

Thick silence around and chaos in the spirit, Sometimes you wish no one hears what’s in you, neither your lips wish to move.

Broken he fell in my lap, I prepared him for the fight and he left for a war with himself. Soon he will leave the battle field of blood and mass and depart for the high.

Left behind will be me, breathing heavy and trying to hide the hollow crack. Once again I shall hold a hand who feels only he is meant to gather the scattered me

He shall watch his last wish come true from the clouds while someone holds me and makes me move on burying the pain to the deepest valley in the heart.

May be the role ends here. The heart dares no more…

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